With you as my witness

One of the benefits of my COVID-induced isolation has been to slow my pace to a speed that allows me to observe rather than rush through my days (most days). There's little on my schedule, giving me margins for reflection unwittingly unavailable in the past. For that I am grateful. Here I am with an abundance of discretionary time, and I find it still takes a lot to manage just me each day. There are only two adults left in our home, and still, I'm a lot. And it's not because my memory is bad. It's because, like a petulant child, I have some simple things I cannot make myself do automatically, no matter how important they are . . .

take supplements 2x each day, as prescribed
floss
eat well (get enough protein), and drink enough water

avoid food allergies
get enough sleep
nurture my loved ones
learn from my mistakes

choose wisdom over woe
live in integrity
be kind
tell the truth
forgive
move my body
take responsibility
refuse to judge others (in process)
maintain healthy relationships
manage my screen time
hold boundaries with others
rest

Of course there's also the bigger, more long-term growing up that continues to challenge--my nemesis is letting go. Every time I (tearfully) let go of something that doesn't serve me, I discover yet another something that needs to go. I'm only now realizing the largess of my emotions, which bring big ups and downs, especially when they are triggered by issues from the past. My most recent reminder was related to Daddy dying young, and the inevitable abandonment that gets triggered when others pull away or disappear. 

With you as my witness, in order to have enough time for my own self-management, I'm finally giving up judging other people. I am no longer interested in spending minutes or hours rewriting other people's actions to my specifications. I refuse to spend one more minute developing clarity about what other people should do with their lives, until I'm impeccable about managing my own.